We Don't Have To Talk About It
by jmt24
Summary: Sam & Blaine don't have to talk about their relationship...or do they?
1. Chapter 1

Sam was drunk. His long hair was sweaty and in his face, but he was told multiple times tonight that it looked so sexy, so he stopped using his hands on his hair and started putting them to better use; shots, waists, maybe a quick piss. Sam was good. He loved this shit, concerts, alcohol, and sex. He loved his relationship, but it was so non-high energy, like this club that he just merged into one with. And that girl. Sam hadn't been with a girl in a long time, he didn't even like girls anymore but this one, she was right in his face: short, skinny, dark hair with huge boobs and a look that could knock him out. They had been eyeing each other since Sam walked in, solo, because he wanted to get drunk, and well his roommate/occasionally lover did not. Sam didn't go to college, and he was 25 now, so naturally he never had those 4 years of drinking every night to get the party phase out of him.

Suddenly a pair of cold hands clamped over Sams eyes. Sam, drunk and dizzy lost his balance and spun around awkwardly to oh! his occasional lover because neither of them would ever admit how they feel…

"Surprise!"

Sam brushed his hair out of his eyes, he didn't have to try to be sexy with Blaine, Blaine already knew his sexy. "Blaine! Dude, it's late why're you… why're you here?" Blaine raised an eyebrow, "Not that I'm not happy you're here." Sam said quickly while he tried to steady himself by putting his hands on Blaine's shoulders. Sam gave a cheeky smile. Blaine gave in moments after.

"So uh..." Blaine was laughing and taking off his black leather jacket as he tried to lead Sam to the bar. "I'm not sure If I should buy you another drink or not?" Sam nodded vigorously as he plopped himself in a free seat at the bar, leaning forward for support.

"Can I get the lightest beer you have and a jack and coke?" Blaine smiled as he shot a $20 toward the bar tender with his classic smile.

"You know you're having the beer right?" Sam joked.

"You know I don't drink beer, besides I got to get on your level."

Sam was all smiles, he loved this game, the game where he could get Blaine to just let loose and be happy with him.

"Which by the looks of it… might take a while."

Sam scoffed, "Well you know what I want to say.." Sam raised his eyebrows and gave Blaine a look.

Blaine shied away a little, not really wanting to deal with this while Sam was drunk, plus he was here now. Sam just nodded, not really grasping the conversation because he saw the bar tender coming back with their drinks. He grabbed excitedly for the glass one but was quickly intercepted and passed the green bottle instead.

"Hey, you want to have fun with me?" Blaine asked as he took a sip of his dark drink. Sam nodded his hair falling back into his face, he knew it would be so much more fun if Blaine was on his level, so maybe he could drink this awful tasting water for a while.

"I'm glad you came out," Sam smiled as he rested his head on Blaine's arm because for some reason Blaine was still standing up.

Blaine laughed, "Alright you know what, you go out and dance," Blaine said as he picked Sam up a little and moved him toward the dance floor, "I'm going to take about 4 shots and I'll be out there in a little, okay?" Blaine gave him a smile and nodded his head toward the crowd of sweaty people high on drugs dancing to a DJ. Sam had his bottle, and was a little confused and slightly heartbroken that Blaine pushed him away, but he could care less at the moment anyway because as soon as he felt dancing he was right back into it.

"What's worse then eyeing a gay guy all night?"

Sam spun around, just swaying slightly, but he could feel his eyes were a mess and all over the place. But it was the girl; her makeup was a little runny, her lips were slightly puffy, and her black shirt was so off center that Sam couldn't help but stare at her purple bra. It was his favorite color after all. "Excuse me?"

"You know it can't get much worse…" She laughed. "He's cute though, congratulations."

Sam smiled, "You're…"

The girl smirked, waiting for some drunken excuse to come out, "You're drunk, and I'm high… and maybe a little drunk." The girl shot a look over to Blaine, Sam did too, he was still at the bar chatting with the bar tender. "Can we dance, or will he mind?"

"Uh, I'm gay," Sam blurted out.

"Not even one dance?" The girl looked up at him with big hazel eyes.

Sam backed away a little. The girl moved closer, till Sam was trapped between her and someone else's dancing body. "If you're gay, then its no big deal, right?" She blinked as she moved in till she was pressed right up to Sam's white v-neck. Sam had not been this close to a girl in a very long time, and he had to admit that drunk him didn't mind the boobs, but that was it… and maybe the fact that this girl was the girl version of Blaine; same hair, same eyes, same skin color and complexion, and a smile of perfect pearly whites. "Come on, why don't you show me a little bit of spine that you're saving for his mattress?" At this she turned around and ground her ass against Sam's junk. Sam still drunk did not have the desire or urge to push this girl off him because it felt nice. Sam loved ass, which is what he was convinced at what eventually led to his awareness of his gay. So, Sam went with it, one hand on her hip, which was so tiny, and the other trying to drink his beer. She noticed this inconvenience right away and turned around as she snagged the beer out of his hand. Sam raised his eyebrows as he watched the girl chug half his drink, "Finish it!" She laughed as she shoved it back in his hand; Sam smiled and did as he was told. "Wait, don't leave me, just put it on the ground, it'll get kicked around," the girl said quickly as she grabbed Sam's hand before he went off.

"You are…" Sam mumbled, "going to get me in trouble."

The girl closed whatever possible space there was between them and danced, she looked up at him and pulled his head down to hers, "No, you're going to get yourself in trouble."

Sam looked at her; it was the eyes, so many colors, he was mesmerized. This girl knew it too, she knew she had him, she could do anything to Sam and he would go for it. So she did, she had her ass in Sam's hands, while she worked her hips in circles against the blonde, their lips so close, that it's the worst tease Sam has ever known. "Fuck," Sam whispered before he closed that gap and kissed this girl Blaine. She was so tiny, Sam couldn't stop moving his hands around this girls back as he pulled her closer and closer, their lips and tongues squishing together. All of a sudden Sam felt it. That feeling that, this was it, this was the last thing he was going to remember before he blacked out. & It sure was because the next thing Sam remembered was fingering this girl whose name he didn't know, in the girls bathroom of the bar. Sam didn't remember much but he knew that the second he started some thing that he would be so excited if he got to finger another girl again. This time was normal, a little too wet, but fun nonetheless. Black out. Sam has this girl against the bathroom stall, slamming in and out of her sloppily, with one hand on her back and one on her boob. Sam was done and then black out. Suddenly it felt like Sam had woken up again, as his first breath of fresh air sunk in his lungs. Sam looked around and immediately started to tie up what had happened tonight. He recognized the street, so that meant they were at the Disco, he had no idea who the people around him were, except this girl that was pulling him to the curb looked familiar. She sat down first and gently tugged at Sam's hand to sit down next to her.

"For you sir," the girl said as she handed Sam a cigarette. Sam grabbed it & looked it over. He watched the girl light her own and blow a puff of smoke out. Sam hadn't smoked in over a year, not that he quit for any reason other than just trying to save money, he suddenly got a craving for that harsh tobacco flavor to hit the back of his throat, so he took the lighter and in silence, but together, Sam got to know this dark haired girl.


	2. Chapter 2

Sam woke up the next morning to someone angrily pushing him off the bed. It was Blaine. "Ow, dude. Major hangover."

Blaine huffed, "Yep." Sam stretched slowly and pulled at his long hair, as he saw Blaine leave the room in his boxers. Sam vaguely wondered how he ended up in Blaine's bed as the last thing he remembered was doing the dishes probably around 4 in the morning. Blaine wandered back in with a glass of water. "Drink." Sam obeyed and crawled back in bed with Blaine. He pulled the smaller man closer to him and just smelt his hair. Blaine mumbled something, but Sam didn't care to hear it. When Blaine mumbled in bed it was no good. Blaine turned around a little out of Sam's' grasp and looked at his sleepy face.

"Where'd you go last night? I came out for you so we could have a good time, then I didn't even see you. I came home and you weren't here either."

Sam didn't want to have this conversation. He couldn't even remember the amount of times Blaine had pulled the same shit, then spit out something along the lines of 'Why does it matter to you, we're not dating.' Sam didn't even move to acknowledge he heard Blaine. He hated when Blaine got needy, and he hated himself when he got needy too.

"Never mind," Blaine mumbled then moved to get out of bed. Sam whined slightly and grabbed Blaine's waist. He pulled him close, groin to groin, Sam had morning wood, Blaine did not, but Blaine let out a breath as they touched. Sam opened his eyes to Blaine's hazel ones. Sam was momentarily confused, as he swore he looked into these eyes all last night. Then it all came back to him. The girl. He fucked a girl. He had been non-exclusively fucking Blaine for three years. Blaine continued to look at him waiting for Sam to do something. Sam couldn't do anything. He was repulsed but also so turned on about what he did last night. He was sad knowing that if he reached down between Blaine's thighs he wouldn't find a wetness waiting for him to enter, but something hard, something he knew. Then again the unknown was what repulsed him, what the fuck does this mean? If anything?

"Sam." Blaine whispered as he pushed his pelvis against his. Sam knew what he wanted, but he wasn't sure if it was fair. He was beyond confused, but Blaine had this thing over him; this deep connection of friendship, family, and maybe love. Sam couldn't deny those eyes, just like last night.

"I came out for you."

"I'm sorry."

"Make it up to me?" Blaine pushed further. Fuck, Sam hated when Blaine was horny. It was too much. Sam started this whole thing; Sam was the one who wanted it. It was Blaine who hated it, now Sam got him addicted. Blaine would never admit it.

Sam remembered the first month in their apartment, it was a huge step up for him, finally living and paying rent by himself. In high school during his homeless period he would've never imagined getting a place this nice, let alone with his gay best friend. The first week in the apartment was great, a lot of moving in and rearranging things to both Sam and Blaine's liking. The second week was the party every night week, the two friends hosted all their different friends, high school friends, work friends, Sam's old home friends, warbler friends, every night was a new group of people with Blaine happily cooking while Sam drunkenly did the dishes after every one left. The third week was when Sam started working at his new job while Blaine started up classes, the two would be at the apartment at different times and only see each other maybe once a day. It was the fourth week, that Thursday night, when Sam had convinced Blaine to go with him to a work party, Sam had the next day off and Blaine didn't have class till 2pm. They both got hammered, stumbling home together, Sam's arm around Blaine's neck. They got back to the place and Blaine retreated to bed, while Sam ran to the kitchen to do the dishes, it was his thing to do the dishes drunk, he felt it contributed because Blaine did most of the other work around the apartment. However this time Sam didn't make it to his bed, when he walked up the stairs to bedrooms he purposely went into Blaine's. No idea to this day why he did it, but something pulled Sam in there that night. Sam remembered a lot of the times him and Blaine were intimate, it had to have been well over 200 times at this point, three years later. The first time however was easily the most intense and mind blowing experience for Sam and Sam only hoped it was the same for Blaine.

 _"_ _Sam?"_

 _"_ _Mmmm, turn around."_

 _Blaine did as he was told and came face to face with Sam. They locked eyes for maybe a second before Sam closed their mouths together, roughly but passionately. They didn't say a single word the entire time, they were both so into it, grabbing, pulling, touching, fucking. Sam never even knew he wanted this, but he did, and he loved it. He loved the way Blaine pushed for more, the way Blaine moaned softly into his mouth, he loved Blaine's thick neck with such a strong pulse, he loved Blaine's belly, how his dick went right up to his belly button. Sam knew how he liked it, and when he grabbed Blaine he knew what to do, then Blaine was on Sam, mouth taking him all in, then Sam turned Blaine around in one swift motion. Sam traced freckles on Blaine's back before he fucked him. He didn't know his best friend felt this good, this right. His ass was amazing, perfect fucking size and shape. When they finished nearly at the same time they both collapsed and didn't move until hours later. They were both still drunk till early am. That's when Blaine freaked out. They woke up together, Sam couldn't really sleep he kept staring at Blaine's face, he was delicate yet strong. When Blaine woke he had a sleepy smile on his face till he saw Sam then got confused, then angry, then more confused, then mostly angry._

 _"_ _What the fuck did we do? I didn't dream that did I? My ass actually hurts, I can't have dreamt that. Sam. What. Oh my God, what did we do? Sam."_

 _Sam tried to calm Blaine down by touching his face but Blaine shot out of bed._

 _"_ _Sam. What. I can't believe you did that. That I did that. That we did that. You know I'm like in love with you. Why would you do that? Why now? What the fuck Sam. We can't do that ever again. This is not good. We're best friends. We're roommates. You're not gay. I'm like in love with you…" Blaine started to tear up and turned away from Sam and went to take a shower. Sam hadn't said anything, he just listened. Maybe he was still a little drunk. Sam rolled over on his back on Blaine's bed as he heard soft sobbing in the shower. He didn't know what to do, so he just laid there till Blaine kicked him out._

"Sam?"

Sam shook his head a little. "Sorry. I was thinking about something."

"I could tell," Blaine grumbled a little bit then rolled on his back. "Should I even bother asking what you were thinking about?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. Well, what were you thinking about?"

"The first time."

Blaine stayed quiet.

"Then the second time and then the third time."

 _"_ _Sam, they got me drunk. Can you take me to bed? & No funny business mister. Promise?" Blaine mumbled sleepily as he basically fell down on the couch next to Sam who was sober and watching Sons of Anarchy. _

_"_ _After this episode," Sam said as he pulled Blaine's drunken sloppy head into his lap. Blaine nodded and passed out. Sam didn't promise. After the episode Sam carried him upstairs. He laid Blaine down, and took off his clothes for him. He was that drunk. Sam got hard as he did this. He couldn't help it. Blaine was perfect. Sam smoked a cigarette out of Blaine's bedroom window to calm down but it only made him sleepy and a little too dizzy to walk back to his room, or at least that was his excuse. He undressed slowly then snuggled in bed with Blaine who reacted to his touch by moving closer to him. Sam traced the same freckles on Blaine's back over and over again while Blaine snored lightly._

 _"_ _I smoked weed. That's why I'm fucked." Blaine whispered a couple minutes later._

 _Sam laughed, "You never smoke with me."_

 _"_ _Do you see how fucked up I am? That's why."_

 _"_ _Better to be fucked up with me than them."_

 _"_ _No, because you fuck me when I'm fucked up. They don't."_

 _"_ _I only fuck you because you're perfect." As Sam finished the sentence he had already reached around and grabbed Blaine's dick, which was already hard. Blaine was breathing weird, he really was fucked up. Sam knew he shouldn't take advantage but was it really when he knew his friend secretly loved it too? Blaine moaned, he loved it. Sam fucked him gently that night, because he was sober and Blaine was not. Sam didn't last long, Blaine was making all sorts of noises that drove him over the edge quicker than ever before, or maybe its because Sam just really loved sex with Blaine. Sam left before Blaine could wake up because he didn't want to hear Blaine bitch again. It made Sam sad because he really loved being with Blaine in this way. Blaine didn't speak to him for two weeks after that time. Blaine spent most of his time at school while Sam tried to stay busy with work. Blaine would still leave leftovers for Sam to eat, and Sam would still get drunk and do the dishes, but words were never said till the third time._

 _Sam knocked on Blaine's door at about 2:30 am on a Sunday morning. "Blaine." Sam whispered into the dark room. Blaine kicked his feet a little then turned around on his back slowly._

 _"_ _I'm not talking to you. I wanna move out Sam."_

 _Sam's heart immediately broke and he just fell into Blaine's bed with soft tears. "Please Blaine, no. I need you. I miss you." Blaine didn't say anything and the two of them laid there for a while, still not talking, Sam wasn't even thinking he was just there. That's how it was always with him and Blaine. Sam turned on his side to face Blaine about a half hour later, "I'm sorry."_

 _"_ _No you're not." Blaine scoffed._

 _"_ _Don't even fucking deny that you like it to."_

 _"_ _I don't wanna talk about it Sam."_

 _"_ _We don't have to," Sam said softly as he moved closer to Blaine, turning him gently so they faced each other. They both looked in each other's eyes, the first time in weeks, and they both just melted into each other in an instant. In their first three times of having being intimate, they had lustful rough sex, gentle good sex, and they made love. Or something like that. They didn't talk about, so Sam wasn't sure._

"I fucked a girl Blaine. I don't remember really, I was so drunk. She had your eyes." Sam confessed but didn't dare look at his lover. Blaine didn't say anything, he didn't move, he just lay there, his arm barely touching Sams.

"Okay," Blaine said finally, still no movement.

"Okay?" Sam whispered, not believing that Blaine didn't have an opinion on this.

Blaine got up out of bed, back turned to Sam, and started looking for clothes, "We're not dating, and you're allowed to sleep with whomever you want."

Sam sighed, "Blaine… C'mon man, you're my best friend. I want to talk about this."

Blaine looked at him, eyes pooling tears although one had yet to fall, "I don't know if I'm the right person to talk to you about this."

Sam hated himself right now. He didn't know what to do or what to say. "I fucked a girl. She was there, she had your eyes and boobs…" Sam wanted to slap himself, he said the stupidest shit sometimes.

A tear fell, "Stop. Please." Blaine lowered his head and made his way out the room, "I'm going to make breakfast, you should shower and I'll have food ready in a bit, okay?"

Sam sighed and took in every aspect of Blaine before he left the room, "Okay."


	3. Chapter 3

After breakfast Sam went for a jog around town, while Blaine worked on his last of finals for his masters degree. Sam received a text halfway through his jog and stopped for a bit in a park, he had no idea where he was he was just running and running.

 **"** **hi its emma."**

Emma? Must be the girl he fucked. Sam didn't know how to respond or even if he should. He stared at it for a couple minutes before he decided not to reply. No sooner than when he put his phone away a pair of small hands were on his shoulders.

"Avoiding me?" A small girl laughed. Sam whipped around and was met with those eyes and immediately knew what was going on. "I live right outside this park, I saw you and figured I'd see if you wanted to talk to me." She moved around the bench Sam was sitting on and sat down next to him. "Now that I know you don't, I am curious as to why." She didn't seem mad just genuinely curious as she looked up at Sam with big eyes and a slight smile.

"I would've messaged you later." Sam tried to say convincingly.

She rolled her eyes, "Yeah right. Did you tell your boyfriend?"

"Yeah, but he's not my boyfriend."

"So you're single?"

"I like the word unavailable."

"Oh right, I remember now. You guys have been fucking for 3 years, but haven't talked about it."

Shit. Sam wished he could remember how much he told this girl. The only thought running through his head was this girl was trouble. She was interesting. She wore her long black hair down with a red sundress, a simple gold necklace, and white converse. She was Sam's age of about 23-25 and for some reason could still pull of this look without it being too juvenile.

"You barely remember last night." She stated, then laughed. "Well I'm sorry for any trouble I caused. I can't resist a face and body like yours."

Sam blushed, and smiled a little.

"There it is." She smiled, which caused Sam to actually smile this time. "I don't mean to be so forward but wait, yeah, no, I'm always forward, but anyway… Last night was fun. I could barely walk when I woke up, so kudos, best sex I've had in a while."

Sam was getting hot in the face, this girl knew how to talk, "You're welcome?"

Emma smiled lightly then didn't say anything for a while. Sam was wondering if she was waiting for him to continue the conversation, but Sam didn't know what to say. "So... you live right outside here?"

"Yep." She answered simply.

Sam didn't know what to say again. Fuck. What happened to him, he didn't even know how to flirt anymore, he's been in a relationship for the past three years…wait no, he hadn't. He was allowed to flirt… if only he could remember and want to make someone else smile besides Blaine.

She sighed. "Look Sam, you seem like a real nice guy. I'll let you and your whatever be, but as someone you fucked recently and seemed to enjoy, I'd like to see you explore your thoughts and feelings. It's unhealthy what you two are doing, and clearly fucking with your life. You have my number, lets be friends. Don't get me wrong, I'm still down to fuck whenever, but not for three years, and not without talking about it." Emma stood up and looked at Sam, her words already causing Sam's mind to race. She reached a hand out to help him off the bench; Sam took it and stood up in front of her. She wrapped her arms around him for a hug, her boobs squishing against Sams chest. "You guys haven't talked about it. I know because you would still be talking right now and not here with me. You're in a difficult situation Sam." She said into his chest before smirking and pulling away, she got on her toes and kissed Sam, "I'm glad to be a distraction anytime, call me." She whispered against his lips before walking away without looking back.

Sam got home and Blaine was asleep at the dining room table, notes and laptop in front of him. Sam smiled as he whipped out his iPhone. He snapped a picture of his sleeping friend before he made his way to the kitchen. Sam had decided on the way that he was going to make Blaine dinner tonight… and get him drunk. Maybe they would talk and maybe they wouldn't, but Sam also just felt like being a boyfriend, he'd have to practice anyway if he actually did want to date soon. So he cooked what he knew how, something simple but something good: chicken broccoli Alfredo. He cooked the noodles as the chicken baked, and he popped the broccoli in the microwave because two of their burners were broken and Sam was just kinda lazy. Sam would pop his head in every couple minutes to make sure Blaine was still sleeping, he was. It wasn't until Sam pulled the chicken out of the oven that he heard a loud yawn.

"What're you doing?" Blaine laughed sleepily from the doorway.

Sam didn't turn around to look at him but replied, "Cooking dinner." He didn't want to say cooking you dinner, or us, implying that they were a couple because he wasn't sure how Blaine would react and he wasn't trying to ruin the night already.

"Smells great Sam. I was actually going to head to the bar and grab food with some school friends but I have no problem eating here now that I smell that." Blaine said as he made his way next to Sam and started poking at the noodles.

"They'll be leftovers, you can go out if you want."

Blaine looked at him, "This doesn't look like a dinner for one." Blaine eyed the two wine glasses and plates ready to be filled.

Sam sighed, "I can invite Emma over, seriously go, it's fine Blaine."

"Emma? This morning she was the girl you fucked, am I right?"

"Look Blaine, I'm done playing this game. We're either talking tonight or you're leaving and Emma's coming over."

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

"I'm tired of just sex. I want to go to the park and cuddle, ride paddleboats, cook dinner without it meaning anything other than just me being a boyfriend, I wanna be shown off and show of someone else without it having this whole dark meaning behind it that we haven't fucking talked about for three years."

"You should invite Emma over." Blaine said as he turned around.

Sam reached out for him, grabbing his arm, "Blaine. Stop. Please. We can't keep doing this."

"Doing what Sam? You started this shit, and pulled me along for three years. I don't want to talk about it now because it's going to end up being her or me. It doesn't feel right to talk about it now. You can't keep doing it. Leave me alone, don't come in my room anymore, and stop getting so drunk. You stop doing it Sam." Blaine left Sam standing in the kitchen full meal ready.


	4. Chapter 4

"So it's easy to see that you both are at fault for whatever your relationship is," Emma said as she sat indian style next to Sam on the couch with her heated up chicken broccoli alfredo. She had made her way over about an hour after Blaine left.

"I've never talked about it, seriously, with anyone. It's all been in my head." Sam confessed as he watched the small girl eat away at his food. She was cute.

"Well now you got me. We can have sex and talk!" She laughed and elbowed Sam a little. Sam laughed too. "& you can make me food anytime," Emma said with a mouthful of chicken.

Sams heart was beating fast and he got that feeling he got used to get in high school when he was around Quinn, Brittany, or Mercedes. He made a mental note to remember this feeling so he could describe it later.

"So, tell me more as I finish this. Then I want the grand tour," Emma winked at him as she took a sip of wine.

"Well, I don't know. There's so much. What do you want to know?"

"How do you think he feels?"

"He loves me… I think."

"Informative. C'mon Sam, give me more. What thoughts keep you up at night?"

Sam laughed with a little wine buzz. "I don't know. Maybe I'm not even ready to talk about it," Sam admitted. He wanted to have a talk with Blaine but he didn't know where to begin, plus the best part of their relationship was that they didn't even need to talk, they just understood for the most part. The past three years had just been a mutual best friend sex relationship without the labels, stress, maintenance, and pressure of being boyfriends. Emma came along & just confused Sam.

Emma sighed, "You're complicated."

Sam looked at her and noticed her slight smile, "Is that bad?"

"I guess not," Emma said as she finished her wine. She shook her empty glass in the air. Sam took it as she wanted more so he finished his and took both their glasses to the kitchen to refill. When Sam returned Emma had finished her plate and was now laying down on the couch. She moved forward slightly and patted the cushions behind her.

"No tour?" Sam joked.

"One more glass of wine."

Sam could go with that. He put her wine glass on the coffee table within reach of Emma and his wine glass on the end table near his head as he spooned her. They cuddled as they laughed at random TV shows for the next half hour, till Emma finished her drink and turned to face Sam. She looked in his eyes for a couple seconds before she kissed him, heavy. She pulled away a minute later and brushed Sam's hair out of his eyes, "Tour." She stated.

Sam wasn't stupid. He took her to his room. "So this is my bed." He said stupidly as he opened his bedroom door.

"Is it comfy?" Emma asked as she walked over to it slowly.

Sam knew she was trying to get him to pull a move first for once, and although wine drunk Sam would get emotional about this later, right now he felt good. Sam watched as Emma laid herself down on the bed.

"Mmm, it's comfy," She whispered as she rolled around and looked up at him with those eyes.

Sam smiled and eased himself down next to her. They looked at each other for a couple seconds before they both laughed. Sam closed the space between them as he pulled the smaller girl to his chest. Emma looked up at him as Sam leaned down and kissed her first.

Sex was quick and easy with Emma. Sam didn't hate it. After a huge yawn and stretch Sam looked at the clock, it was 2:30 in the morning. Shit. At least he slept off the wine buzz. Emma had left after sex, a quick kiss and hug. Sam hated being in bed alone, especially after sex. She was meeting a friend or something so she left Sam to sleep.

Suddenly Sam heard Blaine's laugh from downstairs, was that what woke him? Probably. Sam washed up quick before he headed down to see what was keeping his friend from sleeping at this hour. As Sam made his way down the stairs he could almost feel his heart dropping with every step. Blaine had someone over. Maybe it was just Ryan his best friend from work… Hopefully. Sam made sure his footsteps were to be heard before he turned the corner into the living room. It wasn't Ryan. Fuck. Who was this guy?

Sam cleared his throat as he leaned casually against the door frame.

Blaine jumped a little and turned around immediately to face the taller man. Sam could see Blaine and this guy were holding hands, kinda, the other guys hand was just resting on top of Blaine's. Two half filled glasses of wine on the table, where Emma's had been only a couple hours before. "Sam! Hi. I'm so sorry! Did we wake you?"

Sam narrowed his eyes a little; unfortunately he couldn't really read Blaine right now. "Uhh, yeah; mind keeping it down a bit?" Sam said slowly.

"Oh man, I am so sorry. I was just telling Blaine about my job as a Professor at NYU. You must be Blaine's roommate, I'm Shawn by the way." Shawn sat up and reached to shake Sams hand.

Sam raised an eyebrow and looked at Blaine. Blaine made eye contact for half a second before looking down at his lap. Sam reluctantly shook Shawns hand. Shawn sat back down and they all lingered in silence for a minute taking in the fact that it was almost 3 am. Sam yawed a little as the two men on the couch pretty much twiddled their thumbs as they waited for him to leave. Sam however, eyeing the spot next to Blaine had a different plan. Sam sat himself with a heavy flop next to his lover, smiling wide as he could tell Blaine was uncomfortable. Now Sam could read him. "So Shawn," Sam dragged out his name to be a little obnoxious. "How old are you? Don't you have to have like a million years of schooling to become a Professor?"

Blaine immediately turned to face Sam with eyes wide. Sam knew Blaine thought he was being rude. Shawn just laughed. "I'm 32."

Sam did the math quick, he was 7 years older than him and Blaine. "What do you teach?" Sam grilled him.

"Anthropology. Mainly focusing on cultural ecology," Shawn started to eye Blaine a little now, getting uncomfortable as well.

Sam laughed loud, "Anthropology really?"

"Sam." Blaine hissed.

"What dude? You always hated Anthropology; you said 'it's a stupid soft science with no career potential'. Not to mention you did almost fail that cultural class a couple years ago."

Blaine shook his head. "I'm so sorry Shawn, he's not usually like this. Sam, why don't you go back to bed? I promise we'll keep it down and we'll talk in the morning okay?" Blaine looked up at him with hazel eyes almost pleading for him to leave.

"I have a better idea, why doesn't this guy just leave?"

"Sam!"

"Blaine, what are you doing? Really? Like seriously man? What are you doing?" Sam pushed.

Blaine looked confused, "What are you talking about?"

"Bringing a guy home? & this guy? Fuck you man."

"Whoa, okay guys." Shawn tried to settle things down but Sam wasn't paying any attention to that object basically.

"What's wrong with Shawn, Sam? Huh? Is it because he not only went to college but also has his PhD and is a professor? Is it because he's smart, has a career, is handsome, and has manners? Is it because he's everything you're not, and everything I like?"

If Sam wasn't so pissed off right now he would cry. Blaine knew his soft spots and where to hit him the hardest. "Shawn you should leave, this has nothing to do with you." Sam said looking straight past Blaine to the other guy on the couch, who in Sam's opinion was not that handsome.

Shawn looked confused and made a move to get up, but Blaine's hand stopped him, "Don't."

"Blaine, he needs to leave." Sam stood up now as Blaine mirrored his actions. "You & I both know that this fight is between us and has nothing to do with this white collar person you bring home just to get a rise out of me."

"You are so rude. Shawn is a great guy with amazing stories & we were getting along fine till you came down."

"Till I came down… till I'm around. I'm not leaving Blaine. Ever. This is just as much my apartment as it is yours. Shawn dude please get out."

Shawn didn't say anything as he grabbed his coat and ran out of the apartment, fast. Blaine was livid at this point, "Are you fucking kidding me Sam? What is your problem?"

"My problem is-is that you're using that poor guy as a- as a- I don't know, an object! You were seriously just going to fuck him because I slept with Emma. How do you not see that what you're doing is manipulative?"

Blaine opened his mouth but couldn't form words. Finally Blaine pushed Sam, hard enough to send Sam off balance but not hurt. Sam didn't think Blaine had it in him to physically hurt him. "This dark meaning that you think looms over us is because you think I'm afraid to admit my feelings to you completely. You know I love you Sam. I have since High School. So fuck off and you figure out the dark meaning, because really it's just looming over you." Blaine kicked the railing of the staircase as he left Sam by the couch in the living room. Sam could barely process anything as he heard Blaine's door slam.


	5. Chapter 5

Sam awoke the next morning to loud strange sounds. He had passed out on the couch wanting to avoid his big empty bed and well, Blaine. "Blaine?" The only answer Sam got was more loud sounds coming from the dining room. Sam got up and walked to the next room to see Blaine basically ripping down his pictures and art from the wall and throwing them into a cardboard box. "Dude, what the hell are you doing?"

"I am moving out Sam."

Sam rolled his eyes, held back a laugh, and ran his hands through his hair. He couldn't count the amount of times Blaine had said those words throughout the past 3 years.

"I'm serious." Blaine said as he continued to throw stuff in the box, shattering a glass frame. Sam knew Blaine could feel Sams reaction to the news which was basically a 'yeah right.' Sam couldn't hold back a small laugh this time. "Don't." Blaine warned, his back still facing Sam. "I've had enough Sam. I only called Shawn over because you slept with Emma again."

"What? How'd you-"

"The dishes weren't done when I got home at around 1. You always do the dishes before bed, unless we go to sleep at the same time. I called Shawn whom Ryan has been trying to get me to go out with for a long time, and he had just come over as you woke up. You don't hook up Sam; you're a hopeless romantic. You must've cared about her to sleep with her again. So yeah, I used him to get back at you."

Sam took several steps so he could put his hand on Blaine's shoulder. Blaine shook it off. Sam sighed as he forcefully spun the other man around to face him. Blaine should know by now that Sam had the strength to put Blaine in whatever position he wanted him. Blaine still didn't look at him. So now Sam moved his hands to Blaines head forcing him to look up at him.

"Blaine. Look at me." Sam ordered as he took one more step towards Blaine. When Blaine finally made eye contact Sam let the tension go in his shoulders and sighed happily. "Emma is awesome." Blaine's eyes watered immediately and he went to turn to try to get out of Sam's grasp but Sam held him steady. "You gotta let me finish, okay?" Sam said gently only to illicit no response. "Emma is awesome, she… makes me feel like I'm back in high school again. Seriously, it's a great feeling. I feel like if I'm seen with her I'm at the top of the food chain, ya know? She's super hot, and I can tell she wants to know me better. I want to be with her, only because she's there, and only because she's hot. This feeling was the exact feeling I had with Brittany. I could tell Brittany I loved her and I would do cute things for her, but really all I wanted was sex and she would give it to me. It was so simple man. So easy & fun. But that's nothing right? That's just lust. That's not a relationship, that's just uhh, yeah lust is the right word right? It's just that… Ah, I don't know what I'm trying to say here. It's just that what I feel for her is like… a pinprick on the fingertip and what I feel for you is like a paper cut right in the crease of your knuckles."

"Sam, what're you tal-"

Sam covered Blaine's mouth with his hand; "Don't think of it in terms of pain. Sorry, that's my bad. She is like that littlest white flower in my garden and you are like the giant ass sunflower."

"Sam please, what are you getting at? No more metaphors."

"Blaine. I love you. There I said it! Whew! That felt good. I love you, Blaine. You are the paper cut because I feel more of you, I know you. You have the potential to hurt me more because you have my heart, whether you knew it or not. Emma won't ever have that, you know we hung out for like 4 hours last night and maybe talked for a total of like 20 minutes? Granted the sex was still great but I mean, don't you get it Blaine!? I fucking love you man. I didn't realize it till her. I just lust her. Just like Brittany. Emma and Brittany are those little pretty white flowers you just can't help but pick up occasionally, but you throw that shit out like after you look at it for a couple seconds because it's so small and although it's pretty it does nothing for you. Where as when you love someone they're so big and bright and dominant that you don't even need to look at any other flowers in order to smile because its right there, giving you that glow right back. No one could ever give me what you have given me. You know me better than I care to let anyone else know. The difference between lust and love is that lust comes all the time, but love doesn't. I'm sorry I chose the little white flower, they're cute. But Blaine, the sunflower is so big now that it's all I see, all I want. I'm sorry I had to hurt you to figure this out, but you're it man. The past three years I have just been kidding myself thinking that one day I just wasn't going to go sleep in your bed after a couple beers. The truth is, is that I just needed that liquid courage to go in there because I was scared. I knew you still liked me and I knew that what we had was never a normal broship, I knew that I loved you. This whole time."

Blaine has tears coming from his eyes slowly as a small smile graced his face. His left hand made it up to hold Sam's hand on his face. "Sam. I-I…I love you so much. You know that. I just- I didn't want to ever ruin our friendship. That first night I thought that was it, that you made some drunken mistake, then it kept happening and all these years I just figured you'd come out of whatever phase you were in. If I ever acted like an ass it was because I felt like I gave into you too easily because I loved you, and I felt like you didn't. I don't know. Fuck it. Do you really love me? Do you want to have more than just sex with me, Blaine, a man?"

"Yes. 100% yes."

"Prove it."

Sam dropped down on one knee and looked up at the man he just confessed so much to, "Blaine Anderson, my roommate, my best friend, and my lover, will you please publically and privately be my boyfriend for real?"

Blaine laughed and cried as he said yes. Sam laughed as he jumped right up to wrap the smaller man in his arms and kiss him just like he had so many times before. For the first time in three years, Sam and Blaine made love. Sam knew it this time because they talked about it after. The dark cloud of uncertainty hovering over Sam was gone. He had admitted his feelings in more than just a physical way. Sam could tell the dark cloud of uncertainty hovering over Blaine was gone now as well, as Blaine realized that Sam really didn't just think of him as some kind of sex object. Sam never wanted to talk about it before, because he didn't know how to say it. He still didn't, so flowers and paper cuts would have to do.


End file.
